Lessons from the NICU
Beth and I are so excited to share that our family grew by one! Baby girl Cameron arrived on September 3, three and a half weeks early. Mom and baby are both doing great, and Laney is an amazing big sister who is completely smitten.
Cam’s early arrival meant a stay in the NICU while her lungs got a little extra time to mature. By NICU standards hers was a mild stay. Still, no NICU stay feels mild when it’s your kid, and Beth and I came out of it with a reflection I want to share with you.
People who love your kid and believe in their potential make all the difference.
NICU nurses are remarkable people. Their hearts are full of love for babies who need extra care in their first days and weeks of life, and we felt that love for Cam from everyone who walked into her room. It put us at ease more than they probably realized.
But when it came time to leave at night and get a little rest, there was one more thing that changed everything. Cameron weighed five pounds. She was on respiratory support, an IV and a feeding tube, wired to monitors, and lying under phototherapy lights. It is about as helpless as a human being can look. The NICU staff’s job is to keep these babies alive, so of course that comes first. But we noticed a difference in attitude from one nurse to the next. Did they see our daughter as fragile, or did they see her as capable?
It probably made very little difference in the course of her treatment. It changed our experience completely. The nights we went home most at ease were the nights we left her with someone who saw her strength.
You, as camp parents, have done something like what Beth and I did every evening. You left your son in the care of people you were still getting to know, and you went home. Of course you wanted those people to love him and keep him safe. You also wanted them to see what he is capable of.
That is what North Star is set up to do. Safety comes first here, the same way it did in the NICU. But everything about North Star assumes a boy can do more than he thinks he can. It’s why the boys go on camping trips, clean up after themselves, get pushed in objective based programming, and why a first-year camper who can’t get up on a wakeboard on Monday is still getting coached on Wednesday.
We will love your son and keep him safe. We will also see him for his strengths, recognize his potential, and support him as he grows into it.
Carry on,
Andy
